There Are No Words
Odds are pretty good someone is going to send you a link to this one way or the other - hell, my brother, who NEVER does this shit, just sent me this. It's astonishing.
To set it up, this is a video of a girl in some horrible sparkly black unitard, dancing and pantomiming laser battles to the Star Wars theme and then playing her trumpet along with the theme - completely and totally out of tune. Her name is Stacy Hedger, and I really hope she's done something in the 20-plus years since this came out to afford the therapy she'll probably soon need.
I'm not sure if that's Star Search, or a beauty pageant, or what, but...good god.